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Monday, June 16, 2008

Boners for Batman, Shriveled for Spencer, and Other Recent Rumblings

Since I have incredibly little time to post on here, savor this.

-The Dark Knight keeps getting new trailers. I know you already know this, but I'm 100% sure this movie will be the fucking best movie of the year. By FAR. But in recent days I've thought about all the trailers and teasers they keep putting out. It's starting to get to be too many. I can't resist watching them when they come out, but dammit...I don't want to see the entire movie before I can get into a Batman zone. Showing me a cool clip in the middle of another TV show throws me off my game.

-I saw a clip of Spencer Pratt on FilmDrunk the other day, and he's a fucking idiot. I feel like an idiot mentioning his name here because he has absolutely no reason to be talked about at all. He's some douchebag on The Hills. Letterman rips into him pretty good about being nothing, but Spencer is one of those guys who don't realize they are hated almost universally by average people. He refers to himself as a partner for aspiring rappers(as a job) and says he gets 100,000 to go to clubs. He won't go to a club for less than 100,000. Fuck him.

-You know, there are a lot of shitty commercials on TV. A LOT. But I've found that Mr. Sub is consistently able to put out very good commercials. They don't usually make a heap of sense, but they are always memorable and funny. Kudos to them. Rogers is still at their usual shitheadedness when it comes to commercials. I refuse to buy anything from them because of their bombarding me with these god-awful ads.

-I was in Superstore the other day, and as a former employee, I noticed their new monthly uniforms were long-sleeved collared shirts. I also noticed that everyone there has decided to roll up the sleeves, and not button the collared shirt completely. Every employee I saw had this. Many more had necklaces(guys) or other bullshit to make themselves think they look like a rebel or something. All I know is they were all going for a certain look, and they all failed. This isn't really a big deal, but I just want them to be miserable and all conform while I figure out if the lower fat ranch dressing is worth spending 47 more cents for.

-This is completely irrelevant to anyone's life, but the last couple times I've been at the gym, there has been this girl about my age who runs on the treadmill. She is moderately good-looking. Fake tans too much, bleaches her hair I'm guessing and is a little chubby. Anyways, she runs really intensely on the treadmill, like she's running a marathon. About half the time, she sets the treadmill on an incline and runs on that for a long time. Thing is, she holds on the handles at the front and just leans back on the treadmill so she's actually running straight, making the entire point of running on an incline useless. This goes on for 20 minutes or so and it just kills me whenever I happen to glance over. She looks so fucking stupid leaning all the way back, she has no clue she looks so dumb, and the exercise is completely useless. It's awesome.

4 comments:

The Manute Bol Experience said...

Holy shit, it's a post!

I assumed this thing was dead. The only reason I left it in my favorites was the link the the Ad Wizards site.

Also, Mr. Sub is pretty awesome at everything.

My bet for movie of the year is Feast 2: Sloppy Seconds.

Inbred Nation said...

Hahahaha the main character is Honey Pie. Awesome.

I also thought this died...I sure as hell don't have energy to post. Maybe when school starts again I'll have time.

The latest Rogers commercial is still not clever/good in any way, but it is a step up from the previous ones. At least this one doesn't make me want to kill.

Nazi Synthesizer said...

I'm just as shocked as you guys. Couldn't believe it when I got here.

-Yes. I also cannot wait until The Dark Knight. I'm pretty sure everyone without a vagina is too. Have yet to hear one person talk shit about this movie and that makes for high expectations. Which could be bad...but not in this case. This movie will be amazing. If it doesn't set the bar for comic book movies, nothing will.

I think one guy for the NYTimes was given an advanced screening to review it...and shit his pants in amazement. Said it was phenomenal or some shit. As if that was going to be surprising. They probably didn't even have to pay him to say that. Plus...he said something to the effect of Heath Ledger's corpse getting an Oscar nomination. I don't know about that, but I think his performance will give me chills. And not just my loins this time either.



-I saw the same clip of that fucking dipshit the day after it aired. I love Letterman and I knew he wouldn't bitch out and give that asshat his stupid publicity plug...he was going to ask him the questions anyone with a brain wants to ask. What the fuck do you...um...do? Why are you even on TV? Why didn't your parents abort you?

It was delightfully awkward and pretty funny to see that fucking knob squirm and try to justify is stupid fucking life to everyone. I laughed so hard when he said he was managing that 9 year old rapper who is "better than Jay-Z". That is so painfully stupid I almost had to stop watching the entire trainwreck go down. I will never mention his name, even on the net. Because I bet you he goes home every night and Googles his name to see if he's still being talked about. He doesn't deserve that. He deserves nothing, really.


-Don't even remember a Mr. Sub commercial off-hand. If I saw one I might. I agree with Lindsey, the last Rogers commercial was an improvement. But they had nowhere to go but up. I have always been confused as to how you pay so much attention to commercials. My brain shuts off when they come on. I can barely remember one or two right now. Not matter how funny or terrible they were.


-Havn't been to Superstore lately. If so, I doubt I would notice that. Probably because I never worked there. The retail industry really fucking pisses me off in general now. I hate customers.


-I liked that story. I could actually picture it. I think you should say something to her. Now I'm 100% serious here. I need to know what she'd say. You can be subtle or a dick. Either way the ensuing conversation would amuse me. People who act like that in public should never get a free pass.

Nazi Synthesizer said...

Btw. About that stupid Spencer fuck on Letterman. Forgot to mention this...

Letterman was right to laugh in his face when SP said he got 100,000 to make an appearance at a club. Apparently anyone who knows about that kind of stuff in Hollywood said that is so bullshit its hilarious. Most people said he either gets paid nothing or no more than maybe 5,000 dollars. Which is the going rate for no-talent assholes who appear on the Hills or whatever. They said the only one who could command that kind of cash would have been Britney Spears in her prime or Paris Hilton (Equally retarded, I know. But she's pretty famous) or someone who is seriously huge. And clubs would never get into the habit of doing it. Don't know why this clown would lie about that. Trying to up his price? The only way he'd get 100 grand for going to a club is if the cure for cancer was to let him grind you on the dancefloor. Which I bet that's what he wishes for at night.