Thursday, January 19, 2012

Stupid People Make Me Do Stupid Things

I went on Facebook last night because I have few real friends, and I saw a little discussion on somebody's wall about SOPA. This discussion wasn't on one of my friends' walls - it was just something a friend had commented on. The first stupid thing I did was read the discussion, because it blinded me with rage and essentially ruined my night.

Without getting into too much detail, the topic started with a simple "What the hell are we going to do without all of our websites?!?", which is a perfectly reasonable concern when it comes to this shit bill. Then some asshole (let's call him Dick Lips) decided to chime in with something stupid like "HA! Silly girl...we're in Canada! This bill doesn't affect us at all!" You know what her response was? "Oh thank god! I was worried it would ruin the internet." Now, I'm perfectly fine with people not understanding SOPA and what it can lead to. It's a complicated and horribly vague bill that even the people voting on it don't fully understand. What I'm not fine with is people spreading misinformation on a topic that so few people understand, leading to people just taking their word for it. If you haven't bothered to research the bill and actually learn about it, don't act like your smart by just making shit up.

This is where I started to get pathetic. Rather than just letting it go and moving on with my night of butthole fingering, I decided I needed to inform these people how wrong Dick Lips is and that we're all going to die when the internet sucks. However, because I'm not friends with this girl, I couldn't comment on it. Take a wild guess what I did. Nope, more pathetic. Even sadder. That's right - I told the girl I was talking to to comment on it for me. If that isn't the saddest fucking thing you can do on Facebook, I don't know what is. Not only did she agree to it, but she was actually excited! She saw it as a way to impress people with random knowledge, and I saw it as a way to anonymously tell a guy he's stupid. Win-win.

I would guess I spent a total of about 75 minutes relaying information to her, waiting for Dick Lips to respond with more stupid, dropping more knowledge on him, and so on (FWIW, his main argument was that the domains are global, so the US can't shut them down for anyone outside the US. He also said something about the websites being multinational corporations. He might be legally retarded). Worst 75 minutes of my life. It was like arguing with a tree. Eventually, I got so upset that I stooped even lower into loserdom. Yep, I sent a friend request to the girl. For the sole purpose of telling this guy how wrong he was. It wasn't even about helping other people understand SOPA anymore. I just wanted to see this idiot admit defeat. I woke up this morning, saw that she accepted my friend request, and wrote a paragraph explaining why he was wrong. I won. There was no way Dick Lips could refute my research and expertise. Everyone would see how SOPA affects Canadians, and I'm the genius that delivered that to them.

Nope. Nobody responded. Pretty sure nobody gave a shit anymore. All I did was spend way too much time trying to show up some random guy on Facebook. Fuck.